An actual post...

I AM alive. Our children are great and we are somehow in a routine. Granted it's a routine that ebbs and flows, but still, it's a routine. It feels like we "worked it out" with the girls, and less like it's something we imposed on them.

Around 9ish, tonight it is 8:30 we feed them in their car seats (love the person that invented the rocking car seat) and they fall asleep. We bring them into the bedroom in their car seats and they sleep until midnight, minimum. Last night I think they slept till 3am, which is rare. One of them cries out, squirms and coos loudly and we rise to meet them. Kate or I put on bottles (in water we heat in a pot)and then feed them a bottle (usually 3/4 or less). They usually get sleepy and then we swaddle them in the Miracle Blankets (Miracle is too strong a word for sure) and lay them in the co-sleeper crib next to our bed. They sleep until 6-7am most days.

Not very exciting, but our first routine no less. It's organic in how it came to be, which I like. Basically, it serves the girls best, but also works well for my lady and me.

Check out the picture above with the girls in their black glam onesies. Ruby Faye is on the left. Look closely at her left hand. That's my girl!

My new favorite picture...

Grandma Cheryl took this one!

Old hardwood floors and sleeping babies

So we are renting a cute little bungalow from a friend of ours at this time who is generous enough to give us a deal on the rent. We may be here a while.
Anyway, the house has hardwoods and of course we love hardwood floors. We had stained concrete in our house in Richardson. After two years we decided to never do stained concrete again. It's too cold and hard. Wood floors are the way to go, although I do like a nice berber carpet in the bedroom. Kate does not. When we build our dream house maybe we'll flip a coin.

In this house, it's all hardwoods. Old pine hardwoods that are charming. Except...
with sleeping infants. Our babies primarily sleep in a co-sleeper next to our bed. Most nights our routine is like this: feed babies, burp babies, stare and ooh an awe at babies for a while, drink a glass of wine or two, bathe babies (every other night), swaddle babies (Matt's job), play the YouTube of Hush Little Baby by the Horseflies between 4-8 times, slowly creep back to our bedroom with sleeping babies, set babies in co-sleeper, step away from co-sleeper gingerly.

This is where the problem is. As you step away from the co-sleeper, there is a spot you cannot avoid on the floor, unless you fall back on the bed, that as you are lifting your foot off the floor the floor creaks with the sounds of exploding fireworks. Many if not most times it sounds like a tiny person that lives under the house is shooting a tiny gun rapid fire. This, of course, is most frustrating as the babies will startle and wake up. Thankfully though, they are getting used to the sounds it seems. Less and less do the little firecracker sounds of our wood floors wake them.
Beware the old creaky wood floor with infants.

Grandma Cheryl is coming

Grandma Cheryl is on a flight as we speak. She is going to stay a week with us. She is also coming for Christmas, but she decided she just had to see them now. They have changed so much since she last saw them.

We are thankful and excited about her visit.

First doctor's visit and Mono or Di?

Ruby Faye and Violet had their first doctor's visit two days ago. Everything is perfect and they are now 9lbs each. Violet has passed Ruby Faye in weight, by one once.
We also visited our midwife for the last time and she said they are progressing perfectly as well.
They do have thrush in the their mouths and we are treating it with water and baking soda and a prescribed anti-fungal medication.

The the most important thing we are dealing with now though is that we do not think they are identical. We were told they were because there was only one placenta, but what I have found out is that many times one placenta can actually be confused with two fused together. The thing is that they do not look identical to us. They very clearly look different. So, we are probably going to get DNA testing done.

From what you see in this picture do you think they are identical?

Hush Little Baby

There is a lot of catching up to do on this blog. It's been 7 weeks since Ruby Faye and Violet were born. It seems like a lot longer, honestly.
I am so tired by the time I can write in the evening and thus usually don't. But, here I am. I am not going to get into things too much tonight but I do want to post a song. We have been dancing and singing our babies to sleep with this one every night for the past few nights. After swaddling them, they wrestle like little Houdini wannabes trying to get out of the swaddle. This song has really helped get them to accept the swaddle and sleep.

I love the song obviously, but it has a sadness to it. I was wondering if the singer is singing from the perspective of the little "rich" baby that has a lot of things but still is not happy. What do you think?

New Pictures!

Hey everyone. I just uploaded more pictures. Select the album at the top right.

Cute!

-- M

Be back soon ...

Hello all --

It's been a a fascinating sleep deprived transition to parenthood. Obviously it's taken a toll on my posting but I will be back soon. I am having some probs with my Powerbook, the computer that has all the photos on it. Anyway. Look for more posts soon.

-- M

So here's the final belly pic...

I think this is the most amazing thing I have ever seen. What do you think?
Kate's belly at 37 weeks. It got even bigger than this.

The little angels

My new favorite picture.

Grandma Cheryl

Grandma Cheryl, Kate's mom, just left after a 1 month stay in Austin. She believed that the girls would be born on July 30 so she insisted on coming then. Of course, these things cannot be determined, only guessed at, and that guess was way off. So, she stayed here, at our place and a few others and waited it out. It was not easy, but she sure as hell was not going to miss the birth of her first grandchildren.

2 1/2 weeks later Kate gave birth to Violet and Ruby Faye and we were able to take them home after only two days in the hospital. Although our nurse staff was incredibly good it was the best feeling I have ever had leaving that place with my two daughters and recovering wife.
We made it home safely to Grandma Cheryl and a spotless, scrubbed and beautiful home.

This is the part that would take forever and probably be boring if I typed a list so I'll try and be concise and say that what Grandma Cheryl did for us the first two weeks of our children's lives now classifies her as my hero. She cooked, cleaned, fed, diapered, swaddled, bathed/sun-bathed, spent tons of money buying us groceries and other necessities, walked, fed and brushed pets (who now love her more than they do us), stayed up late to help console both crying babies, slept on a couch in our living room, and overall made our transition into parenthood one of the best experiences of our and our children's lives. Everyday Kate and I would look at each other and talk about how amazingly blessed we are to have her in our lives.

Thank you so much Grandma Cheryl for everything you did and do. Our lives are better for the time you spent here with us during the first weeks of Violet's and Ruby Faye's lives.

Sleep

I write odes to sleep in my head all day. I never thought I'd think of 4 hours of sleep as a good night's rest. Now I do.

I always knew there was a "parent" gland that was dormant until one had children. Once the children come the gland kicks in, releasing that extra energy needed to perform things like 3am feedings and changings.

All is well in the Milliken household and Ruby Faye and Violet radiate beauty.

At home

We arrived home yesterday at 6 pm. Kate, Violet and Ruby Faye are rapidly becoming breast feeding experts. We are supplementing with some formula to help before Kate's milk comes in.

We finally got a few 2 hour sleep stretches this morning and I feel like a different person. All is well and here are a few more pictures.

THE MILLIKEN TWINS!

Violet Estelle Milliken, 5lbs 14 oz and Ruby Faye Milliken, 6lbs 1oz. Born 8pmish 8/17/08.

38 weeks now...

So here we are. Kate originally predicted August 13th to be the babies birth date. For some reason, somewhere along the way we gave up on that date, thinking they would come much earlier. I can't remember exactly why, but today we are amazed and thankful that our babies are taking their time. It is best. The benefits of a 38 week gestation range from better lung development, a shorter learning curve for breast feeding to less of a chance for jaundice. All our care providers have told us getting to 38 weeks is ideal. At this point, going 40 weeks is only two weeks away and is highly possible. I do hope the girls come before then but I accept that they will come at the perfect time.

I attribute Kate's and the girl's incredible performance to several factors: diet, vitamins, exercise, the best midwife, OB and perinatologist care and Kate's not working, which has given her the time to rest and live relatively stress free during this time. This was a choice we made and is not without consequences, but those are mainly financial and can be resolved in due time. I am happy we made the choice to do everything we can to achieve a full term pregnancy.

The feeling now is surreal. You are so close to having your children in your arms, yet it feels so far away. There is a nervousness, like the kind you might have when meeting new people. It's a good, exciting feeling. Part of me feels the presence of old souls in our children. I feel that these babies are manifestations of a life force that is never ending. And I know deeply that we will learn as much from them as they will learn from us.

Dream Map

All is well and they like it in there...

37 1/2 weeks and all is well. The babies are healthy, Kate is healthy and so we wait. We did think they would come sooner, but I understand now why you don't guess and make predictions about these things. It only muddles your thoughts and energy. That said, we're going with the the original guess, the 13th.

The nurse midwife at the doctor's office said 38 weeks would be optimal as did our midwife MariMikel. So, all is well. The children are getting what they need: more time to develop and mature inside the womb. This will make life much easier for them and us. Kate can handle it. She is strong. She is my Queen.

Full term!

Today marks 37 weeks of Kate's pregnancy. This is considered full term for twins by most resources on the subject. She and I are brimming with pride at her accomplishment. Faye and Violet should be over 6lbs each now.

There are many reasons why Kate was able to reach this goal: diet, vitamin regimen, mental toughness, exercise, prayer and positive thought and the great support she's had from our midwife, doctors, friends and family throughout her pregnancy. At this point I have stopped guessing when they will come and just letting it be. We ARE ready.

Cat escort

Lila, our beautiful "Russian blue" cat really knows Kate is pregnant. She has always wanted to sleep near Kate and usually wants to be right on her belly. Last night she slept at Kate's feet. Kate usually wakes 3-4 times (CORRECTION: 9-10 TIMES) a night or more and eats or pees. Lila woke up every time with her, jumped off the bed and escorted her to where she was going. She would wait until she was done and then escort her back to bed. Only when Kate was back in bed would Lila get back near her feet and curl up to sleep again.

Update

We visited the midwife today and she gave Kate an A+ and said if she was a betting woman she would bet on another week. Everyday they have in the womb the better. It's more likely they'll adjust to the "world of air" much faster if they mature more in the womb basically.
Kate is superwoman. :)

Kate's mom addrived yesterday from Tennesee. It's great to have her here. She sent us a link to a song she thought the girls would like. It's my new favorite. Enjoy.

She felt Violet's head...

We visited the doc today and Kate had a cervical exam. The nurse midwife was able to feel Violet's head and Kate is 1cm dilated. Wow! She said there might be a little bit of blood so don't be worried. When Kate got up there was a medium size spot of blood. Kate started crying (more whimpering) and we asked again and they said it is normal. The fact that she was able to feel Violet's head made everything more real.

On our way out of the office, thankfully we ran into Dr Sebestyen on the elevator. She always has such a great energy. She assured us the blood is normal and there will be a lot more during labor.

Any day now...

We are literally days away from the birth. Kate's contractions, while not regular, are more frequent. She is way more uncomfortable in general: back pains, belly aches, some nausea. These are all signs of the body preparing for birth.

No one ever told me, or maybe I did not listen, but sleeping for her is the worst part, or not sleeping. She just can't get comfortable in bed. She can't breathe well when laying down or even sitting up, really. So, the time when she normally rests the most is when she is the most uncomfortable. It's frustrating for her, but she is handling it well. I spend a lot of time scratching her back and that usually gets her snoring. Yes, she who never snored before except for cute little mouse-like sniffles, now snores like a sailor. It's cute too, but sometimes it's way loud and startling in the quiet of the night.

All is well and the little butterflies in my stomach are fluttering more each day in the biggest countdown of my life.

Random panoramic image

I discovered a new feature on the Canon G9: panoramic images.  This is me laying on the bed with the computer.

35 week sonogram

We could only get an image of Faye's, Baby A, head and foot this time. I pieced them together in what I thought was the correct position.

And the tape says, 47 weeks

So every time we (yes, I go to EVERY appointment with K) go to the doc she measures K's belly, vertically from pubic bone to sternum-ish area. The length of the tape tells how many weeks you are measuring. Normal stuff done every time. Well this time things were a little above normal you might say. Or longer than normal. She is measuring 47 weeks pregnant. The average gestation period for single babies is between 37-42 weeks. She is 5 weeks, in size, beyond that. With twins, that is par for the course. It is an amazing thing and I am so proud of her. It takes a great amount of strength and patience to do what she is doing and I see it everyday.

We are hoping for another week or so, but if they come now they'll be fine and it is likely they'll go home with us. In a week, there is a 90% chance they'll come home with us so that is our minimum goal.

No planning this stuff of course so when they come, that is their time. I am ready (because I know not).

Rain

It's finally raining here. It's been a month easily since the last little spat and that one didn't even count. This is a real rain. Sitting in my office listening to thunder and the splashing is a calming relief. It could rain for a month straight and I would not care. Please do!

One man's relief is another man's suffering. We have hurricane Dolly to thank for our respite. I hope she was not too harsh on those on the coast.

35 week update -- silver medal

Our perinatologist gave K a silver medal today.  35 weeks = silver.  High five.  We aren't going for silver though.  36 weeks is gold.  As cheesy as it sounds, I find the analogy comforting.  It provides a focal point.  Mentally it helps you create the energy to "get there".  

Every day we talk about when we think it will happen.  "So, when do you think they will come?"  It's fun,  a diversion.  Deep down I know they will come at some time that cannot be known and making predictions is just a silly game.  Still, it's entertaining.

It will happen when K's uterus stretches to the point of "this is enough" and commences the process which will bring it relief.  We heard today, from our perinatologist, that the babies' pituitary glands are in charge as well.  The babies might tell the mother's body when the show is to begin.  "You can go jump on a trampoline or hike up a mountain but you aren't going to go into labor until those little babies' pituitary glands say go, or your uterus has had enough", he said.  I've never heard the part about the pituitary gland until today.  Good to know that our little girls can tell us when it's time.  

My bet is August 3rd.  But all I care about is healthy babies and healthy mom.

Stats:

The doc said they both weigh about 5 lbs each now and heart rates were about 145.  Good movement and breathing reflex.

K's blood pressure is 138/78.

Couvade

Couvade is the French word "to hatch". It is also known as "sympathetic pregnancy". Basically, some men develop pregnancy symptoms during their partner's pregnancy: things like an enlarged belly, intense hunger, lethargy and vomiting. Apparently, in some places a long time ago men actually used to be the ones that took to bed during or immediately after birth and were given the care and attention usually given to women these days. Some of these men also acted out pregnancy symptoms. The actual person giving birth was regarded as the one second in need. Men's needs came first. Fun times for women.

One of my favorite things to do with my wife early on in the pregnancy was to moan, "Ahh. My couvade. Ohh. It hurts." whenever she asked me to do something. The truth is that my belly has grown a bit during her pregnancy. So, if couvade can also be defined as eating lots of vanilla ice cream then I certainly have it.
There is also artificial couvade in the form of the pregnancy suit. See below.

Swimming

Early mornings might be my favorite time to swim.
The light and air are are soft.
Only a few people, gliding and splashing
with quiet hellos and smiles.

Swimming is a break from the constant pull of gravity.
The heart loves the water. The weightlessness helps it move
the blood througout the body.
If you are pregnant, it is great for reducing swelling.
But most importantly, it lifts the spirit.

Random Images, Summer 2008 -- ATX

34th week sonogram results

woo hoo! The results are in. Our babies are fabulous!
Here's the stats:
Heart rate:
Baby A -- 144
Baby B -- 157
Weight:
Baby A -- 4lbs 10oz
Baby B -- 4lbs 9 oz

They are practicing breathing, moving well, still head down, and at least one of them has hair! We did have a little start when she showed us Baby A's profile and her nose was all smushed looking. I thought, uh oh. That's not good. But, thankfully K asked and it's because of the the angle of the profile pic. It was showing the full front of the nose so it looked strange.

Good job K! on another great check up.

The fine line between ass kicking and inspiration

So the missus is getting a little swollen. Has been for a few weeks. It's damn uncomfortable for her as you can imagine and just overall makes her feel nasty. Our OB office basically said it's normal and that she should be swimming and keeping off her feet. The swimming didn't happen much but she has been good about resting. However the swelling is still there and has worsened some over the past week.

Today we visited our midwife, Marimikel. It was probably the best visit we've had, in my opinion. Let's just say K learned what the line between ass kicking and inspiration is. I did too because I am always right there in the room. I am fully invested. The fine line was crisscrossed a few times and some tears were shed.

Basically we've been letting our diet slip a bit and today was probably the low point: smoothie (very healthy!), toast with jam, toast with peanut butter and then these nasty little cheese filled egg roll things. Marimikel always asks what we've been eating and her response was, "That's horrible." She took K's blood pressure and it was 140/80. This is way higher than it has ever been. We usually visit the OB office in the morn and blood pressure tends to be lower earlier in the day so we had never seen it that high.

Anyway, she really lit into K. "Damn girl! You've gained x pounds and your blood pressure is way high. This has got to change. Now! Otherwise you are looking at getting induced because of hypertension." It was a little tough to watch but we're adults and that is what we pay Marimikel for: to tell it like it is and not "f" around. We want her to do whatever it takes to help K have a healthy vaginal birth for both our girls.

I took the rest of the day off and we went on a shopping run for, Chlorophyll, skull cap and passion flower tincture, Epsom salts and loads of veggies, chicken and turkey. The bottom line is that we've been eating way too much salty and fatty foods and K's extra weight gain, swelling and high blood pressure are the result. We have a challenge to get the swelling down and reduce her weight and blood pressure.

I am inspired from our meeting today because all the health recommendations (most, at least) apply to me as well. I need to lose a good 10-15 lbs and up my vegetable intake and exercise more.

I am so thankful to have the kind of guidance we receive from Marimikel. We have very competent doctors but they more focused on healthy babies, which is good of course. Marimikel's focus is healthy, natural, vaginal birth AND healthy babies. Anything standing in the way of that is going to get a serious ass kicking.

Removing the veil

I have this recurring thought in my mind about removing the veil. The veil separates the non-father world from the father world. The birth of my two daughters will remove this veil. I will transform into a different person. I will be in a place that has been obscured from my view.

I often think how can a father not feel utterly in awe of the birth of his children? At times I feel as if I have flown to some other exotic, lush new planet far away. I am orbiting around, waiting to land to meet my new children and begin my new exciting life. For me, this is the ultimate experience of my life so far, by far.

I have not found my passion in life. I do not have a career. I have not pursued my dreams. I am not even 100% sure what my dreams are still. I have lived an amazing life and done many interesting things but all pale in comparison to this. I write this, knowing that being a father does not complete a man's life. I was fine with not having children if that was my path. All lives and experiences are amazing miracles. Bringing forth life though is a miracle I am grateful to get to experience.

And so here I am, in a really interesting space in my life right now. I am about two weeks away from the birth of my children. The fact that they are identical twins is beyond amazing to me. I never imagined it as a possibility. I even (too) quickly dismissed the idea when K was telling some friends we might have twins, a couple days before we found out, in the name of being realistic. "We need to be realistic with people", I said. Nice one. K likes to point this one out to me occasionally. I am two weeks away from being responsible for the lives of two helpless humans that I helped create. I hope to foster in my daughters an awe of life in all it's beauty, danger, fragility, and power. I hope their wonder and lust for life burns strong everyday of their lives. It does for me.

Listen to one of my favorite songs below. It always makes me feel the strange beauty of life.

Love Is Stronger Than Death

The belly, the steering wheel and not loving cars

Today is the last day K is allowed to drive, our decision. When she got in the car to go get her hair did (I love saying that for some reason) she could only fit her index finger between belly and steering wheel. She is 33 1/2 weeks but measuring 41 weeks! The seat can't go back anymore because she would not be able to reach the pedals. So, no more driving for K. All she has to do now and rest and grow those babies.

I do most of the driving anyway so it's not much of a change. We got a Honda Odyssey because with the car seats I can't fit comfortably in the Accord. I'm not a car lover so "love" isn't normally a word I associate with cars but we really like the thing. It has the double automatic sliding doors and these funky automatic flap windows in the back. Gadgets! yay!

I have zero concern regarding the "cool factor" of a car. Cars are just really expensive tools. My favorite car is not even a car. It's a truck. I just love knowing that I have a vehicle that at any moment I can haul a 1/2 ton pallet of grass if need be. My second favorite car is a bike. Then a wheel barrow. Then a dolly. Now, I do love dollys. My dolly is my back's best friend.

Wraps and slings and things

Here I am practicing the Maya wrap. The little stuffed elephant that will be one of my daughters' first stuffed animals is a good stand in. Wraps seem pretty easy.

Our friend Kristy told us to get Ergos. They are super nice baby carriers that are comfortable to the baby/child. We did because she is smart and we trust her opinion on kid and baby stuff.

She gave us a demo of her putting her little boy Elijah in on her back. It was a pretty amazing physical feat. She had to sling him onto her hip, hold him there, grab around and shift him to her back and then pull him into the pack. I was impressed and also taking notes. I'm going to be doing the same thing in no time.

33rd week sonogram results

All is well in twinsville.  The weekly sonogram alternates with one week being a "reassurance" scan for heart rate, breathing reflex and fluid around the fetus.  The other weeks we get the long sought after weight estimation.  We did not know this was the case, the alternating that is, so we had even placed bets on their weights.  It was a little disappointing to not get them.  They looked great though.  You could see them "breathing", practicing for the real thing.  They do this reflex about 3-5 times an hour.  

Kick counts tonight were great as well with B being the more active one: 10 kicks in 13 minutes.  A had 10 kicks inn 42 minutes.  She was tired.

33rd week sonogram

Tomorrow K gets her 33rd week sonogram. I'll report the results then! It's like getting a present every week.

Heat

Whenever we cook our house becomes so hot it is quite unpleasant. We love to cook so this happens all the time. The oven has no external vent so all the heat goes back into the room. We pretty much have to crank the A/C all the time at this point. Luckily our little abode has pretty good trees around it to help block the sun or it would be worse.

For a mom preggers with twins, this is doubly uncomfortable. K has gained over 50 lbs and has to wear a nylon belly band and it causes a rash. She is one gorgeous momma though. I don't recommend having twins in the middle of summer in Texas, but I don't not recommend it either. If you wanna have kids you're going to have them whenever. We wouldn't change it for the world, of course.

I do think of my little girls and what it will be like when they are older. I certainly hope we can get a handle on global warming and their world isn't one of crazy high temperatures and drought. I believe we will find a way to keep from cooking ourselves and this planet. I see the higher gas prices as being a blessing. People are finally starting to drive less and pay attention to their fuel consumption on a large scale it seems.

Name help

So we are thinking of naming one of the girls Odessa.  We live in Texas and there is a small, but fairly well known town out west named Odessa.  We are starting to think growing up in Texas with the name Odessa might be a hassle for the little one.  

"What's your name?"

Odessa

"You from Odessa?" or "Oh, you named after the oil town?" or "Just like the city, huh?"

No.  Like odyssey meaning a journey or spiritual quest.

"Oh"

Regardless of what you think of the name, do you think a little girl named Odessa, living in Texas would think, "I wish they wouldn't have named me that."?  

Post a comment.

Head vs Pelvis

While reading Birth: The Surpising History of How We Are Born by Tina Cassidy I came across an interesting discussion of the evolution of the mechanics of human birth.

It starts out by stating that human babies are becoming larger over time as a byproduct of better nutrition and overall quality of life, and human brains appear to have grown larger over the last 2 million years.

She continues by describing the very specific way the human baby has to travel through the pelvis in order for birth to work succesfully. It is best for the baby to enter the pelvis chin tucked and facing to the side, and upon moving through baby needs to twist and and turn face down. Once the head is born, the baby must turn one more time to let the shoulders through. All of this twisting and turning evolved to accommodate larger head sizes with marginally larger pelvic openings. There is not a lot of room for deviation from this prescription of movement, but there is some, i.e. not all successful vaginal births happen this way.

The most interesting conclusion from this is that as humans evolved larger heads, human females did not evolve larger pelvises in the same proportion. Essentially, humans had to start giving birth to their babies before they were "ready" to leave the womb. This is one reason why human infants are one of the most helpless creatures compared to their counterparts in the wild. We all have seen the image of the newborn foal awkwardly standing and then running just minutes or hours after being born. I think I read, as far as mammals go, Panda and human infants rank as the most helpless. The first few months out of the womb is sometimes called the 4th trimester.  As we evolve further and likely brain sizes grow, thus head sizes, will humans eventually get to a point where all births are cesarean sections and vaginal birth is not even possible?

For multiples, this issue is less a factor because they are almost always smaller than singles and thus have an easier time traversing the pelvis. This is one reason I feel so fortunate we are having twins! Of course there are two births as opposed to one and that presents different challenges, but I am confident that K will  have an easier time helping each one of our little ones out because there are two of them.

Midwife visit

We went to our midwife yesterday. I always come out of those appointments feeling energized. She is an amazing woman. MariMikel Penn at http://www.newlifebirthservices.com/. She does it all and her energy will blow you back. If you are pregnant and in Austin, I STRONGLY recommend you consider her.  

The second most interesting part about the appointment, the first being hearing the babies' heartbeats, was her insistence that we make love and drink a glass of wine. Uh huh. Before anyone gets alarmed over that recommendation, let me state clearly, she does not recommend you drink alcohol during your pregnancy, BUT... if you are tense, stressed or having a hard time relaxing a glass of wine does you and the babies good by assisting in relaxation. Stress is a bad thing during pregnancy. And best of all, having sex does you and the babies good too. Her quote: "What got them in there, will help get them out." I know not everyone agrees with this advice, but I do.

Sex helps relax the muscles in the vagina and sexual arousal releases oxytocin, a hormone that shows up in large amounts during delivery. The idea is that the combination of the relaxation and oxytocin helps prepare the body for delivery ahead of time.

Excitement

There's an excitement in our house that is palpable. I was certainly feeling it and today K said the same thing. In a matter of weeks (hopefully 5), the girls will be here. We've prepared well but have more to do . We go to our midwife tomorrow and get a doctor's check up on Wednesday.

K has packed her bag and the babies' bag and we've worked on their room. We've been hanging out in there more and it's really got a nice feel to it. Calm, cool and comforting. Just what a baby wants.

Postpartum forever

Our midwife frequently says, "Birth? It's just a few hours and then their here. It's nothing in comparison to what comes after: postpartum forever." Things like breastfeeding and just managing to get enough sleep are way harder than the birth in her opinion. I don't think a mom in the middle of labor would agree to that, but in the big picture I think it's true.

Babies shower

We had our Baby Shower last Sunday. We had a great time and got loads of things for the babies. I know nothing, or knew nothing, about baby shower protocol and was a little stressed about boring everyone with all the gift opening stuff. But it was great really, and everyone gathered around, family and friends, and were really happy to sit and watch us open all cute little baby girl stuff. Those that weren't fortunately had beer and wine in the kitchen.

It was my father's 79 birthday as well and we celebrated with the most decadent caramel tres leches cake from Mr Natural. He's an amazing man and I have so much gratitude for all he's done for me in my life. Here's to you Pop.

Thanks to everyone who made it a great day.

Babies shower

Bed stuff...

K has been spending more and more time in the bed lately.  The weight of the babies and the size of her belly demands that she lay down on her left side.  This is pretty much the only position of comfort.  Most all things I have read say that the left side is the most comfortable and is the side you should lay on if you are in pre-labor and need to wait it out.  Why it is the left side, I am not sure but probably something to do with internal organs.  It's true though.  If anyone knows why please let me know.  

So beds...  It's possible, but not likely, Kate will be on strict bed rest for a while, possibly weeks.  Knowing this we decided to start looking.  We were sleeping on a Corsicana Queen Kate bought years ago that had been through a lot.  It was fairly comfortable but it moved and bounced every time one of us shifted position.  So we parted ways and the Queen was sent to the dump.  No wait.  I just remembered.  I set it out for bulky pick up and in a few hours someone had taken her away.  You can't give beds to Salvation Army or thrift stores so most end up at the dump.  I am thankful our was recycled.

Anyway, we splurged on a Tempur-Pedic King Size bed.  The Classic version I think.  I have always been skeptical of memory foam.  It just seemed gimmicky, but now I am a believer.  It molds to your body and feels terrificly comforting.  I rarely have the back pains I used to wake up with.  And having the extra space of a King is liberating.  I like my space, although Kate says she often feels like I am in the other room.

It was expensive.  $2500 and we technically could not afford it, but it's a lifetime investment and for our sanity's sake, with the kids and Kate's belly needs, it is well worth it.  We got a zero percent deal too.  Relax The Back Store.  Ask for Bart.  He was very helpful.  They will also give you a tax-fee deal if you get a doctor's note!  

Happy sleeping!

Pics of The Day

K, K, T walking the spiral hill.

Pics of The Day

Chancho buddy

Classes complete and in the home stretch...

Tonight we took our final childbirth education class. A milestone indeed, and one that we have been preparing for for so long, whether just thinking about this day or talking about it. Now we are in the home stretch. Realistically we probably have 4-5 more weeks until our little ones are here. During the class O was flipping around and giving sweet little kicks and punches.

There are 7 of them and they were long and tiring, But VERY informative. They unfortunately were videos of our midwife speaking the class into a camera. When I found this out, at the first class, I felt a little shafted. Can't we at least have a live person teaching us some of the most important material we'll need to know? The television is tiny and placed way up in the corner so at least some people have to crane their necks to see it and the A/C was out for several classes, blah blah. That is really my only complaint about New Life's services. MariMikel is so energetic and actually very funny that she made them tolerable and K did not seem to mind so I was able to put it aside and ended up taking copious notes.

31 weeks. Heaviness. REAL heaviness.

A couple days ago K started experiencing extreme "heaviness" in her belly. Of course it has always been heavy, or heavier than normal but now it is a heaviness that shouts out and will not be ignored. The girls must be gaining enormous amounts of weight. Last sonogram they weighed in a 3lbs, and 3lbs 3 oz. I am thinking they are close to 4 lbs if not already.

Laying down is the only thing that creates comfort. I know she is really happy we splurged and got that king size Tempur-Pedic. I am too!

-- M

Equally Shared Parenting

This is an interesting article at nytimes.com.

Equally Shared Parenting

In my opinion, it is silly to try and have a 50/50 split and I am not even sure what that means realistically. I do know that each family is different and that sharing of responsibilities is a must for all. We all have strengths and weaknesses and if you have a healthy relationship you should share along those line.

Picture of the Day

New Life Birth Services

http://www.newlifebirthservices.com/

MariMikel Penn is our midwife. We are having our twins in the hospital but she will attend the birth. She is the most amazing person and we are blessed to have her working with us. Her knowledge of health care and everything birth and baby related is beyond measure. If you are in the Central Texas area I strongly recommend using her services.

Lovely little noses...29 weeks. Can you see them?

Documenting the experience...

Tonight my wife, Kate, and I decided we will document our lives through the birth of our children and our experiences after. We understand that before we know it they will be grown and on their own and hopefully we can capture some of the experience for reflection and reminiscing and sharing with others. Most of all I am excited that one day my children will be able to read about their journey into this world and their early life in it.