She felt Violet's head...

We visited the doc today and Kate had a cervical exam. The nurse midwife was able to feel Violet's head and Kate is 1cm dilated. Wow! She said there might be a little bit of blood so don't be worried. When Kate got up there was a medium size spot of blood. Kate started crying (more whimpering) and we asked again and they said it is normal. The fact that she was able to feel Violet's head made everything more real.

On our way out of the office, thankfully we ran into Dr Sebestyen on the elevator. She always has such a great energy. She assured us the blood is normal and there will be a lot more during labor.

Any day now...

We are literally days away from the birth. Kate's contractions, while not regular, are more frequent. She is way more uncomfortable in general: back pains, belly aches, some nausea. These are all signs of the body preparing for birth.

No one ever told me, or maybe I did not listen, but sleeping for her is the worst part, or not sleeping. She just can't get comfortable in bed. She can't breathe well when laying down or even sitting up, really. So, the time when she normally rests the most is when she is the most uncomfortable. It's frustrating for her, but she is handling it well. I spend a lot of time scratching her back and that usually gets her snoring. Yes, she who never snored before except for cute little mouse-like sniffles, now snores like a sailor. It's cute too, but sometimes it's way loud and startling in the quiet of the night.

All is well and the little butterflies in my stomach are fluttering more each day in the biggest countdown of my life.

Random panoramic image

I discovered a new feature on the Canon G9: panoramic images.  This is me laying on the bed with the computer.

35 week sonogram

We could only get an image of Faye's, Baby A, head and foot this time. I pieced them together in what I thought was the correct position.

And the tape says, 47 weeks

So every time we (yes, I go to EVERY appointment with K) go to the doc she measures K's belly, vertically from pubic bone to sternum-ish area. The length of the tape tells how many weeks you are measuring. Normal stuff done every time. Well this time things were a little above normal you might say. Or longer than normal. She is measuring 47 weeks pregnant. The average gestation period for single babies is between 37-42 weeks. She is 5 weeks, in size, beyond that. With twins, that is par for the course. It is an amazing thing and I am so proud of her. It takes a great amount of strength and patience to do what she is doing and I see it everyday.

We are hoping for another week or so, but if they come now they'll be fine and it is likely they'll go home with us. In a week, there is a 90% chance they'll come home with us so that is our minimum goal.

No planning this stuff of course so when they come, that is their time. I am ready (because I know not).

Rain

It's finally raining here. It's been a month easily since the last little spat and that one didn't even count. This is a real rain. Sitting in my office listening to thunder and the splashing is a calming relief. It could rain for a month straight and I would not care. Please do!

One man's relief is another man's suffering. We have hurricane Dolly to thank for our respite. I hope she was not too harsh on those on the coast.

35 week update -- silver medal

Our perinatologist gave K a silver medal today.  35 weeks = silver.  High five.  We aren't going for silver though.  36 weeks is gold.  As cheesy as it sounds, I find the analogy comforting.  It provides a focal point.  Mentally it helps you create the energy to "get there".  

Every day we talk about when we think it will happen.  "So, when do you think they will come?"  It's fun,  a diversion.  Deep down I know they will come at some time that cannot be known and making predictions is just a silly game.  Still, it's entertaining.

It will happen when K's uterus stretches to the point of "this is enough" and commences the process which will bring it relief.  We heard today, from our perinatologist, that the babies' pituitary glands are in charge as well.  The babies might tell the mother's body when the show is to begin.  "You can go jump on a trampoline or hike up a mountain but you aren't going to go into labor until those little babies' pituitary glands say go, or your uterus has had enough", he said.  I've never heard the part about the pituitary gland until today.  Good to know that our little girls can tell us when it's time.  

My bet is August 3rd.  But all I care about is healthy babies and healthy mom.

Stats:

The doc said they both weigh about 5 lbs each now and heart rates were about 145.  Good movement and breathing reflex.

K's blood pressure is 138/78.

Couvade

Couvade is the French word "to hatch". It is also known as "sympathetic pregnancy". Basically, some men develop pregnancy symptoms during their partner's pregnancy: things like an enlarged belly, intense hunger, lethargy and vomiting. Apparently, in some places a long time ago men actually used to be the ones that took to bed during or immediately after birth and were given the care and attention usually given to women these days. Some of these men also acted out pregnancy symptoms. The actual person giving birth was regarded as the one second in need. Men's needs came first. Fun times for women.

One of my favorite things to do with my wife early on in the pregnancy was to moan, "Ahh. My couvade. Ohh. It hurts." whenever she asked me to do something. The truth is that my belly has grown a bit during her pregnancy. So, if couvade can also be defined as eating lots of vanilla ice cream then I certainly have it.
There is also artificial couvade in the form of the pregnancy suit. See below.

Swimming

Early mornings might be my favorite time to swim.
The light and air are are soft.
Only a few people, gliding and splashing
with quiet hellos and smiles.

Swimming is a break from the constant pull of gravity.
The heart loves the water. The weightlessness helps it move
the blood througout the body.
If you are pregnant, it is great for reducing swelling.
But most importantly, it lifts the spirit.

Random Images, Summer 2008 -- ATX

34th week sonogram results

woo hoo! The results are in. Our babies are fabulous!
Here's the stats:
Heart rate:
Baby A -- 144
Baby B -- 157
Weight:
Baby A -- 4lbs 10oz
Baby B -- 4lbs 9 oz

They are practicing breathing, moving well, still head down, and at least one of them has hair! We did have a little start when she showed us Baby A's profile and her nose was all smushed looking. I thought, uh oh. That's not good. But, thankfully K asked and it's because of the the angle of the profile pic. It was showing the full front of the nose so it looked strange.

Good job K! on another great check up.

The fine line between ass kicking and inspiration

So the missus is getting a little swollen. Has been for a few weeks. It's damn uncomfortable for her as you can imagine and just overall makes her feel nasty. Our OB office basically said it's normal and that she should be swimming and keeping off her feet. The swimming didn't happen much but she has been good about resting. However the swelling is still there and has worsened some over the past week.

Today we visited our midwife, Marimikel. It was probably the best visit we've had, in my opinion. Let's just say K learned what the line between ass kicking and inspiration is. I did too because I am always right there in the room. I am fully invested. The fine line was crisscrossed a few times and some tears were shed.

Basically we've been letting our diet slip a bit and today was probably the low point: smoothie (very healthy!), toast with jam, toast with peanut butter and then these nasty little cheese filled egg roll things. Marimikel always asks what we've been eating and her response was, "That's horrible." She took K's blood pressure and it was 140/80. This is way higher than it has ever been. We usually visit the OB office in the morn and blood pressure tends to be lower earlier in the day so we had never seen it that high.

Anyway, she really lit into K. "Damn girl! You've gained x pounds and your blood pressure is way high. This has got to change. Now! Otherwise you are looking at getting induced because of hypertension." It was a little tough to watch but we're adults and that is what we pay Marimikel for: to tell it like it is and not "f" around. We want her to do whatever it takes to help K have a healthy vaginal birth for both our girls.

I took the rest of the day off and we went on a shopping run for, Chlorophyll, skull cap and passion flower tincture, Epsom salts and loads of veggies, chicken and turkey. The bottom line is that we've been eating way too much salty and fatty foods and K's extra weight gain, swelling and high blood pressure are the result. We have a challenge to get the swelling down and reduce her weight and blood pressure.

I am inspired from our meeting today because all the health recommendations (most, at least) apply to me as well. I need to lose a good 10-15 lbs and up my vegetable intake and exercise more.

I am so thankful to have the kind of guidance we receive from Marimikel. We have very competent doctors but they more focused on healthy babies, which is good of course. Marimikel's focus is healthy, natural, vaginal birth AND healthy babies. Anything standing in the way of that is going to get a serious ass kicking.

Removing the veil

I have this recurring thought in my mind about removing the veil. The veil separates the non-father world from the father world. The birth of my two daughters will remove this veil. I will transform into a different person. I will be in a place that has been obscured from my view.

I often think how can a father not feel utterly in awe of the birth of his children? At times I feel as if I have flown to some other exotic, lush new planet far away. I am orbiting around, waiting to land to meet my new children and begin my new exciting life. For me, this is the ultimate experience of my life so far, by far.

I have not found my passion in life. I do not have a career. I have not pursued my dreams. I am not even 100% sure what my dreams are still. I have lived an amazing life and done many interesting things but all pale in comparison to this. I write this, knowing that being a father does not complete a man's life. I was fine with not having children if that was my path. All lives and experiences are amazing miracles. Bringing forth life though is a miracle I am grateful to get to experience.

And so here I am, in a really interesting space in my life right now. I am about two weeks away from the birth of my children. The fact that they are identical twins is beyond amazing to me. I never imagined it as a possibility. I even (too) quickly dismissed the idea when K was telling some friends we might have twins, a couple days before we found out, in the name of being realistic. "We need to be realistic with people", I said. Nice one. K likes to point this one out to me occasionally. I am two weeks away from being responsible for the lives of two helpless humans that I helped create. I hope to foster in my daughters an awe of life in all it's beauty, danger, fragility, and power. I hope their wonder and lust for life burns strong everyday of their lives. It does for me.

Listen to one of my favorite songs below. It always makes me feel the strange beauty of life.

Love Is Stronger Than Death

The belly, the steering wheel and not loving cars

Today is the last day K is allowed to drive, our decision. When she got in the car to go get her hair did (I love saying that for some reason) she could only fit her index finger between belly and steering wheel. She is 33 1/2 weeks but measuring 41 weeks! The seat can't go back anymore because she would not be able to reach the pedals. So, no more driving for K. All she has to do now and rest and grow those babies.

I do most of the driving anyway so it's not much of a change. We got a Honda Odyssey because with the car seats I can't fit comfortably in the Accord. I'm not a car lover so "love" isn't normally a word I associate with cars but we really like the thing. It has the double automatic sliding doors and these funky automatic flap windows in the back. Gadgets! yay!

I have zero concern regarding the "cool factor" of a car. Cars are just really expensive tools. My favorite car is not even a car. It's a truck. I just love knowing that I have a vehicle that at any moment I can haul a 1/2 ton pallet of grass if need be. My second favorite car is a bike. Then a wheel barrow. Then a dolly. Now, I do love dollys. My dolly is my back's best friend.

Wraps and slings and things

Here I am practicing the Maya wrap. The little stuffed elephant that will be one of my daughters' first stuffed animals is a good stand in. Wraps seem pretty easy.

Our friend Kristy told us to get Ergos. They are super nice baby carriers that are comfortable to the baby/child. We did because she is smart and we trust her opinion on kid and baby stuff.

She gave us a demo of her putting her little boy Elijah in on her back. It was a pretty amazing physical feat. She had to sling him onto her hip, hold him there, grab around and shift him to her back and then pull him into the pack. I was impressed and also taking notes. I'm going to be doing the same thing in no time.

33rd week sonogram results

All is well in twinsville.  The weekly sonogram alternates with one week being a "reassurance" scan for heart rate, breathing reflex and fluid around the fetus.  The other weeks we get the long sought after weight estimation.  We did not know this was the case, the alternating that is, so we had even placed bets on their weights.  It was a little disappointing to not get them.  They looked great though.  You could see them "breathing", practicing for the real thing.  They do this reflex about 3-5 times an hour.  

Kick counts tonight were great as well with B being the more active one: 10 kicks in 13 minutes.  A had 10 kicks inn 42 minutes.  She was tired.

33rd week sonogram

Tomorrow K gets her 33rd week sonogram. I'll report the results then! It's like getting a present every week.

Heat

Whenever we cook our house becomes so hot it is quite unpleasant. We love to cook so this happens all the time. The oven has no external vent so all the heat goes back into the room. We pretty much have to crank the A/C all the time at this point. Luckily our little abode has pretty good trees around it to help block the sun or it would be worse.

For a mom preggers with twins, this is doubly uncomfortable. K has gained over 50 lbs and has to wear a nylon belly band and it causes a rash. She is one gorgeous momma though. I don't recommend having twins in the middle of summer in Texas, but I don't not recommend it either. If you wanna have kids you're going to have them whenever. We wouldn't change it for the world, of course.

I do think of my little girls and what it will be like when they are older. I certainly hope we can get a handle on global warming and their world isn't one of crazy high temperatures and drought. I believe we will find a way to keep from cooking ourselves and this planet. I see the higher gas prices as being a blessing. People are finally starting to drive less and pay attention to their fuel consumption on a large scale it seems.

Name help

So we are thinking of naming one of the girls Odessa.  We live in Texas and there is a small, but fairly well known town out west named Odessa.  We are starting to think growing up in Texas with the name Odessa might be a hassle for the little one.  

"What's your name?"

Odessa

"You from Odessa?" or "Oh, you named after the oil town?" or "Just like the city, huh?"

No.  Like odyssey meaning a journey or spiritual quest.

"Oh"

Regardless of what you think of the name, do you think a little girl named Odessa, living in Texas would think, "I wish they wouldn't have named me that."?  

Post a comment.

Head vs Pelvis

While reading Birth: The Surpising History of How We Are Born by Tina Cassidy I came across an interesting discussion of the evolution of the mechanics of human birth.

It starts out by stating that human babies are becoming larger over time as a byproduct of better nutrition and overall quality of life, and human brains appear to have grown larger over the last 2 million years.

She continues by describing the very specific way the human baby has to travel through the pelvis in order for birth to work succesfully. It is best for the baby to enter the pelvis chin tucked and facing to the side, and upon moving through baby needs to twist and and turn face down. Once the head is born, the baby must turn one more time to let the shoulders through. All of this twisting and turning evolved to accommodate larger head sizes with marginally larger pelvic openings. There is not a lot of room for deviation from this prescription of movement, but there is some, i.e. not all successful vaginal births happen this way.

The most interesting conclusion from this is that as humans evolved larger heads, human females did not evolve larger pelvises in the same proportion. Essentially, humans had to start giving birth to their babies before they were "ready" to leave the womb. This is one reason why human infants are one of the most helpless creatures compared to their counterparts in the wild. We all have seen the image of the newborn foal awkwardly standing and then running just minutes or hours after being born. I think I read, as far as mammals go, Panda and human infants rank as the most helpless. The first few months out of the womb is sometimes called the 4th trimester.  As we evolve further and likely brain sizes grow, thus head sizes, will humans eventually get to a point where all births are cesarean sections and vaginal birth is not even possible?

For multiples, this issue is less a factor because they are almost always smaller than singles and thus have an easier time traversing the pelvis. This is one reason I feel so fortunate we are having twins! Of course there are two births as opposed to one and that presents different challenges, but I am confident that K will  have an easier time helping each one of our little ones out because there are two of them.

Midwife visit

We went to our midwife yesterday. I always come out of those appointments feeling energized. She is an amazing woman. MariMikel Penn at http://www.newlifebirthservices.com/. She does it all and her energy will blow you back. If you are pregnant and in Austin, I STRONGLY recommend you consider her.  

The second most interesting part about the appointment, the first being hearing the babies' heartbeats, was her insistence that we make love and drink a glass of wine. Uh huh. Before anyone gets alarmed over that recommendation, let me state clearly, she does not recommend you drink alcohol during your pregnancy, BUT... if you are tense, stressed or having a hard time relaxing a glass of wine does you and the babies good by assisting in relaxation. Stress is a bad thing during pregnancy. And best of all, having sex does you and the babies good too. Her quote: "What got them in there, will help get them out." I know not everyone agrees with this advice, but I do.

Sex helps relax the muscles in the vagina and sexual arousal releases oxytocin, a hormone that shows up in large amounts during delivery. The idea is that the combination of the relaxation and oxytocin helps prepare the body for delivery ahead of time.